Meeting your First Couple
so you and your partner are thinking
about swinging for the first time?
Exciting times await you, my friend!
But you’ll probably need some tips, to help keep the butterflies down.
Even though swinging meetups are notoriously more chill, than say meeting someone as a single person, they still require some navigation.
Maybe you’re not as keen on the couple as they are on you, or maybe you like them a little too much.
Either way, you can handle any of these situations with just a good understanding of the basics.
So let’s get started.
HOW DO WE BEGIN?
So you’ve scrolled around on Feeld or Tinder, and connected
with a couple that ticks all of your compatibility boxes?
That's fantastic— liking what you see is a crucial first step.
Next, you’ll probably move your chat to a more private platform like say, Telegram.
This is just to ensure you’re genuinely clicking with them before arranging an in-person meet.
What that conversation will look like, is most likely a 4-way chat, or a 2-way (if your partner trusts you to handle all of the communication).
Although, a 4-way chat, has a better chance of ensuring that there is a good group connection, before you actually put in the effort to meet.
This is also a great time, to share more photos (they do help increase trust a bit).
Just be careful with sharing stuff like raunchy pics. You never know who’s on the other side. Keep that for after the meetup, maybe?
But if you’re getting green lights across the board, then it’s time to take it into the real world.
2. Where do we meet?
Think of this as just like any other first date—
except there’s no pressure to force a connection.
Casual drinks at a comfortable venue work wonders for breaking the ice.
Pick a location everyone is comfortable with, put on your best outfit, and get ready to go.
And if you’re feeling nervous, don’t stress, that’s totally normal;
the other couple probably feels the same way.
Remember, there’s no obligation to take things further if the chemistry isn’t there.
If you show up and they don’t match their pictures, don’t just ghost them or do the old—
“I’m sorry, I won’t be able to make it, the dog is sick”.
Be an adult, have a drink, and politely tell them that you aren’t interested in taking this further.
Stay relaxed and simply treat it like you would any other date night.
It would also be a good idea for you and your partner, to fully discuss:
your expectations
boundaries, and
safe-sex practices
before you meet up with anyone.
This ensures there are no surprises if you decide to take things to the next level.
3. WHAT SHOULD WE TALK ABOUT?
Don't worry, you don't have to jump straight into X-rated topics.
Start with casual conversation, get to know the other couple, and see if there's a connection.
The naughty topics should come up naturally (and probably will), however, there's no pressure to jump into anything physical right away. The first meeting is all about getting comfortable and seeing if there's a spark (both personality-wise and attraction-wise).
It is important to remember that honesty is the best policy here, so be upfront about your experience level. If you're new to swinging, be open about your comfort zone. A good couple will be understanding and happy to guide you along. And if you’re more seasoned, lead with that, as things like soft-swapping probably aren’t interesting to you (am I right?).
Now here is the big thing.
You probably shouldn’t hook up on the first night. First take the time to go home, discuss the meeting with your partner and what you both felt, honestly. If you both agree that you had a great time, check in with the other couple, and if they agree, schedule another meeting.
This time, you’re free to choose a more private setting like your home or a hotel, if you’re keen to get right to the action.
Conclusion
Remember, swinging is all about—
exploration and having fun.
Don't put too much pressure on yourselves, and most importantly, be safe!
Lastly, you might be wondering, “What if we go home with a couple & we don’t like them?”
This is an awkward situation for anyone, but doesn’t need to be.
Everyone is an adult here, and changing your mind is human.
Just be upfront about it, be honest, and speak with kindness.
It’s nothing personally against them, sex is a very connected event, so the more honest you are, the better it is for everyone involved.
