5 Books For ENM Beginners
Looking to delve deeper into
the world of Non-Monogamy?
You've come to the right place!
Whether you're a curious newcomer or a seasoned vet, books are your best bet for exploring the twists and turns of ENM.
Trust us, we've been around the block a few times, and these reads have been our guiding lights.
We've handpicked the five best books to guide you on your journey. From eye-opening guides to juicy memoirs, these books offer a buffet of perspectives and practical advice to help you navigate the ENM landscape with swagger and savvy.
So, grab a glass of wine.
Find a comfy spot-
and dive into some of the best reads on ENM that’ll enlighten and entertain you.
The Ethical Slut
by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy
First up, we've got the bible of non-monogamy.
The Ethical Slut is the go-to guide for anyone looking to explore ENM in ways that are both ethical and emotionally sustainable.
Written by two seasoned pros, Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy, this book dispels myths and arms you with all the skills you need to rock a non-monogamous lifestyle.
You'll learn how to navigate self-reflection, honest communication, and safe sex practices. It's like having a chat with your wise, slightly wild aunties who tell it like it is, no sugarcoating. Whether you're solo or coupled up, this book helps you set boundaries, resolve conflicts, and define relationships on your own terms.
If you're serious about ENM, this book is your starting point.
2. Sex at Dawn
by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá
Buckle up for a mind-bender with Sex at Dawn.
This one's a game-changer. Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá challenge the notion that monogamy is the natural state for humans. Spoiler alert: It's not.
Backed by evidence from anthropology, biology, and psychology, they paint a picture of our ancestors living in groups where sharing partners was the norm.
This book will open your eyes to a whole new understanding of human sexuality.
It's not just about debunking myths; it's about embracing a more authentic way of relating to others. Ready to revolutionize your sex life and embark on a journey of self-discovery?
This book is your ticket.
3. Mating in Captivity
by Esther Perel
Ready to spice things up?
Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel is your guide to transforming intimacy and sex in long-term relationships. Perel, a leading voice on erotic intelligence, dives into the complexities of desire and domesticity.
Through captivating case studies and engaging discussions, she reveals how to inject excitement, playfulness, and poetry into your love life.
It's like having a candid chat with a friend who
just happens to be one of the world's top relationship therapists.
This book is wise, and witty, and will leave you inspired to rethink intimacy.
4. POLYSECURE
by Jessica Fern
This isn't your typical relationship book.
Fern, a polyamorous psychotherapist, takes attachment theory and flips it on its head, extending it into the realm of consensual nonmonogamy. Spoiler alert: You can have secure, happy attachments with more than one partner.
Fern's nested model of attachment and trauma is a game-changer, offering fresh insights into how our emotional experiences shape our relationships.
But she doesn't stop there.
She gives you six actionable strategies to foster secure attachments across all your relationships.
"Polysecure" is not just a theoretical breakthrough; it's your practical guide to mastering the art of loving multiple partners.
Ready to revolutionize your love life and deepen your connections?
This book is your ultimate playbook.
5. OPEN DEEPLY
by Kate Loree
One-fifth of Americans have tried CNM, and nearly 30% of adults under 30 find open relationships morally acceptable. Yet, resources for navigating this exciting territory are scarce.
Enter Kate Loree.
With nearly two decades of personal experience and a specialization in treating CNM clients, Loree dives into the toughest challenges of non-monogamy.
Through candid vignettes from her life
and her clients’ experiences,
she reveals the highs, lows, and everything in between of living a consensual non-monogamous life.
"Open Deeply" goes beyond typical self-help books, weaving together attachment theory, neurobiology-informed grounding skills, and effective communication strategies. The result? A compassionate, attachment-focused roadmap for non-monogamy that helps you avoid pitfalls while building healthy, adventurous relationships.
Non-monogamy is a wild ride, but with "Open Deeply," you'll be well-equipped to make it an exhilarating journey.
Conclusion
These books aren't just pages filled with words—
they're your roadmaps through the exciting world of non-traditional relationships.
Each one offers wisdom, fresh perspectives, and practical tips to help you navigate ENM with confidence and clarity.
So, as you turn the last page, remember that your journey doesn't end here—it's just beginning.
Keep exploring, keep learning, and above all, keep an open mind.
Your adventure in ethical non-monogamy awaits, and with these books by your side,
